| HOODIE
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adjusting
still wonders what it takes to be happy
depressed?
backpack
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| WHO AM I (Lili Frost)
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Today, on the street
In the metro,
It's a melancholy day
No one speaks
Passing you by
Wondering why
Today, like any day
Rolled out of bed
Talked on the telephone
Went to the doctor, she said
You're OK
Still I wonder
Who am I
Today in the air
On the water
Ships pass you by
Clouds fantasize
Dragging shapes across the sky
Wondering why
Who am I
Clarion crows for the courtsmans brigade
Centuries before on this very stage
Gypsies serenade, passed through DNA
And so it found its way
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maystar * designs
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Monday, February 27, 2006
@3:14 pm
Christian Carter says..
There's one mistake that almost all women make with men they're interested in.
This particular mistake is the source of so many different problems women have in their lives and relationships, that dealing with it should be a healthcare benefit or something.
Ok, maybe that's a little extreme, but you get the point.
And by the way, men make a similar mistake, but it shows up in different ways.
The mistake is allowing yourself to become OVERLY EMOTIONAL around the person you're dating in a negative and self-destructive way.
So then what happens?
The short-lived emotional outbreak that was only a big deal to you at the time, finds a way to screw up the great situation that you have going.
What's going on here with how men react?
Why do some men make such a big deal out of having strong feelings, caring so much and wanting to talk and share?
The truth is, doing these things is showing the man that you're EMOTIONALLY OUT OF CONTROL.
And nothing says "RUN" to a guy more clearly early on than these intense negative emotional "episodes" and an out of control partner.
Let me remind you..
When most women start dating a great guy, theyhave a whole slew of POSITIVE FEELINGS, IDEAS and BELIEFS about where things are going and how they might work out.
These are common, satisfying and exciting thoughts. And often times, it's the power of these positive feelings that are the catalyst in helping women look past the FEARS and NEGATIVE FEELINGS from past situations and move into something new.
In other words, these POSITIVE FEELINGS and BELIEFS become the driving forces to "try it again".
In this situation, lots of women tell themselves in the back of their minds:
"I'm smarter now."
"This time it's different."
"I'm over that bad period of my life where I let jerks and immature 'boys' mess up my life." "This guy wouldn't hurt me the way that other jerk did."
But the reality is that lots of women who tell themselves this aren't actually "different" or "smarter" at all.
The only thing that's changed is the scenery.
Instead, they still carry the FEARS and NEGATIVE BELIEFS that hold them back from creating new situations and experiences in their lives.
But then it happens...
In the new situation, with the new guy, things suddenly stop being so easy, so new and so "perfect".
And eventually something seems "off" or goes wrong here too with the new guy, even if it's something small.
And "WHAM!"
All the old fears and negative beliefs come rushing back out of nowhere. That familiar sick feeling in the stomach is back. The guy problems they thought they had left behind followed them here too.
So they FREAK OUT.
They become anxious and those voices start playing in their head again.
"There must be something wrong with me."
"There are no good men... they're all selfish jerks and I'll never find one who gets me and can really love me for who I am."
"I'll never find true love, so I should just give up and stop putting myself through so much pain."
I bet you've got a few of your own here to add to the list from that negative voice in your head. We all do.
And you know what?
All of these are utter and total CRAP.
Here's what I've learned about these voices...
When these negative voices start getting louder, most women leave behind the confidence, "positivity" and optimism they had with a man that helped create the great situation in the first place.
And they literally become DRIVEN by fear.
All the goodwill disappears and is replaced by defensiveness and negative sensitivity.
This is what it's like having ZERO control of your emotions.
And guess what?
This is 100% "GRADE A" MAN REPELLENT.
Men do not want to get involved or committed to women who act emotionally dependent from the start and "lose it" at the first sign of difficulty.
When most women see the first signs of trouble or that a man is acting "non-committal" after becoming close and "invested" in the situation, they FREAK OUT inside.
When a man doesn't call back or starts to withdraw, they get upset and afraid and act in fear.
When a man doesn't share the same feelings at the same time in the same way, they become nervous and unsure in everything they do with a man.
The point I'm making here is that if you allow yourself to become TOO emotional and fearful in situations with men, and dependent on their behaviorfor your emotional state, it will screw you up.
Guaranteed.
And even worse than letting your emotions control you and your behavior is trying to TALK men through all of the emotions and fears.
This is a nail in the coffin.
Think about it for a second...
Most men don't even talk through their feelingsor fears with their BEST FRIENDS.
Men prefer to confront, challenge, ignore or break through fear in some kind of masculine way. Anything but observe or share fear. It's not part of their make-up.
I know it doesn't make sense, but it's the truth.
-to be continued..
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