| HOODIE
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adjusting
still wonders what it takes to be happy
depressed?
backpack
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| WHO AM I (Lili Frost)
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Today, on the street
In the metro,
It's a melancholy day
No one speaks
Passing you by
Wondering why
Today, like any day
Rolled out of bed
Talked on the telephone
Went to the doctor, she said
You're OK
Still I wonder
Who am I
Today in the air
On the water
Ships pass you by
Clouds fantasize
Dragging shapes across the sky
Wondering why
Who am I
Clarion crows for the courtsmans brigade
Centuries before on this very stage
Gypsies serenade, passed through DNA
And so it found its way
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maystar * designs
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Tuesday, April 11, 2006
@10:50 pm
WHAT MEN THINK ONCE THE HONEYMOON IS OVER
I get emails everyday from women wanting to know how they can "get back" to where things were when things started with a man. They remember how things used to be and wonder why they can't be that way now.
So they ask themselves...
"Why is he so distant?"
"Why doesn't he share his feelings anymore?"
"Why don't I feel close to him, and why am I not getting my emotional and other needs met like I used to?"
So why is this so common to so many women?
I've recognized what a big part of it is.
CHANGE.
When things are good, or more to the point, comfortable or predictable in our lives, we DON'T like the idea of change... at all.
In any relationship, after the initial attraction, mystery, intrigue, etc. passes and the honeymoon slows, guess what?
Things start to change inside a relationship. Whether you like it, or not. And both the man and the woman are responsible to know how to see it, think about it and deal with it.
And here's where TONS of women run into a wholeset of COUNTERPRODUCTIVE thoughts and SELF-DESTRUCTIVE behaviors.
They get caught up in an almost hopeless battle to try and prolong the honeymoon stage and the ease by which they could connect and share with the man. Especially when they don't see that the man is noticing or making the same efforts that they are.
This usually shows up with things like thefollowing:
- Noticing that a man isn't as attentive oraffectionate anymore, so you pull back to see if he'll notice and close the gap, but he doesn't and so you withdraw, leaving nothing but distance between the two of you
- Trying to CONVINCE a man to FEEL some way or act some way he used to or you want him to, which of course doesn't work because you can't "logically" make someone FEEL an EMOTION, and it all ends up backfiring as he sees you as needy or "nagging"and pulls away more
- You start "trading" him for the normal caring things any couple should do for each other. You only act open or affectionate if he does something first. You only initiate things physically if he does something first, etc. The list goes on...
Recognize anything here?
Well, unfortunately, these common behaviors actually work as a special high-grade form of "man-repellent" in a relationship.
When men sense the emotionally uneasy feeling these create, they most often do one thing with a woman...
WITHDRAW.
And they start their own weird emotional versions of the same kinds of destructive and distance-creating behaviors.
The truth is, every woman is going to go through situations that are going to make her want to react in these COUNTERPRODUCTIVE ways.
But there is a better way...
-Christian Carter-
to be continued..
Oh dear.
Is this true? Is this true?
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