| HOODIE
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adjusting
still wonders what it takes to be happy
depressed?
backpack
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| WHO AM I (Lili Frost)
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Today, on the street
In the metro,
It's a melancholy day
No one speaks
Passing you by
Wondering why
Today, like any day
Rolled out of bed
Talked on the telephone
Went to the doctor, she said
You're OK
Still I wonder
Who am I
Today in the air
On the water
Ships pass you by
Clouds fantasize
Dragging shapes across the sky
Wondering why
Who am I
Clarion crows for the courtsmans brigade
Centuries before on this very stage
Gypsies serenade, passed through DNA
And so it found its way
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maystar * designs
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Monday, February 09, 2009
@11:17 pm
i am soooooooo happy that father is back. alhamdulillah. means a lot. it's been more than 24 hrs now he's at my grandma's house which is his in-laws house. yup, i'm living there now for a while.
it's been...ok. but tiring. i realised he's a little like his mother. he likes to use the hp, he calls for little things.. i'm not complaining. i guess i'm just emotional. i understand how hard it is for him but he don't seem to understand us. i'm not asking for that though. i mean.. AAH!
i really don't know how to start this new life. my brain's in chaos. i wanted to talk but i feel weak doing so. what i wanted to do now is either to resign or get a maid. i've never felt this responsible before. a daughter, a grandaughter, a sister, a nurse, a student. he needs 24 hr care. i pity grandma looking after him. i mean my dad is damn heavy. he can sit up but to transfer from bed to chair, his diapers, medicine, feeding..too much for her to handle. he didn't even sleep last night! tried walking with him today but he's not as strong as when he was in the hospital. made me ____.
the only thing i'm glad now is i do have support from family and good friends. i'm definitely glad i don't have a boyfriend. at the moment. but i think because my last boyfriend was him. i still feel soberandotherthingsabout it til now. don't know if you're reading this but i kinda hate you. ugh! that is probably one of the reasons why this happen. one other reason like my uncle said, "You must have done a very small thing in life that Allah loves and He wants to see more of that." "Or maybe test you," i added. Made me ____ again. another reason too is.. i probably wasn't being a good girl for the past almost 23 years.
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